fears of being burnt
Sunday, January 11, 2009 @ 1:07 AM
woke up..6.15am..
got a spike of pain down in e chest..
fell back to sleep again..
n i missed drum.
went to e doctors..
is it really just muscle contraction?
it hurts like fuck..
seriously..
i aint making an excuse to be late for drums.
i hope they dun think that way..
muscle contractions..
leading to affecting my lungs..
n thru e heart in e process?
or am i simply thinking too much.
RP as a new training ground, to me its
a really cool change
e vibe is diff..
n it feels like working at a studio now.
slightly more lively as well...
with students around..
a cooler environment.
and of cus my fav part,
isolation
n no mufflers!
i cant do much 2day in my condition..
but determined to give it all asap...
it sucks to see a drum
but u cant play it
with full energy n strength..
since its e only source of my expression now.
n i take pride in it :)
jamming sessions on friday...
gonna try some cool stuff then..
wooo!
its only when u put ur heart n soul
into it..
everything will show on ur performance..
that aint looking to good on my studies.
i fear..
i fear i'm letting feelings going over my head.
i fear i'm putting my hopes too high..
i fear my judgement..
i fear being over confident..
i fear being cocky..
i fear being ahead of myself..
i fear rejection..
i fear being hated..
i fear being dissapointed by..
i fear being dissapointed..
gonna take a leap of faith..
wish me luck.